The Salad Situation

Have you watched the It movie? It is based on a novel by Stephen King, I have read the book and watched the movie. One overweight boy named Ben Hanscom grew up later losing those extra pounds and told the rest of the group members during their reunion that he managed to do so by eating a lot of salad and running more. Ben found a replacement for his junk food and thus he lost weight.

See, I am inspired by Ben in this novel. I wish I could gobble down on salad like he did but I secretly know that I can’t. I eat only a few type of vegetables and dislike the rest. So I think of a few vegetables that I can make into a salad. You know the salad in Mcdonalds Spicy Chicken Mcdeluxe burger? I can eat that, no problem. As I grocery shopped, I stare for quite a while at the vegetables section and try to think of any other veges that I would tolerate. Haha. Cherry tomatoes? It tastes ok, better than the big tomato. Carrots? Hate the taste but if thinly chopped it’ll be alright.

Popped in chicken breast, eggs, Thousand Island sauce (I know it has lots of calorie but this helps to curb the vege taste) and tofu into my shopping cart. I diced the chicken breast and marinated for a day with soy sauce, pepper, and lemon juice. Baked it in the oven for 20 minutes and oh my god from now on we puttin’ lemon in every dish!!!!! The chicken was amazing. I washed the veges and chopped what needs to be chopped. As I was cutting the tofu, I realized I bought the wrong tofu. I bought the soft tofu that people eat in tau fu fah 😂 That’s how bad my grocery shopping skill is. I thought they were the same!!! But I fried it anyway. Still too soft but let’s not waste em’.

Mixed everything with Thousand Island sauce, and I am ready to gobble down. After 3 spoons, I wanna puke. I ABSOLUTELY HATE SALAD. I tried squeezing more sauce but I am just overwhelmed with the Salad Situation. The salad taste good but vegetables did not. The chicken helped. You think I’m done with my salad? I forgot that I microwaved 2 eggs and I quickly bring them out, drained the excess water and put in my salad. STILL DOESN’T TASTE ANY BETTER. So I have another bowl of salad in my fridge and I don’t know what to do with it. The best would be to eat with a toasted bread, Subway-ish.

< em>*eggs aren’t in the picture because I remembered about them after taking this picture.

Advertisements

My acne scars fade in a month.

What? ACNE SCARS TAKE FOREVER TO DISAPPEAR. After battling with my acne by consuming Doxycycline for 5 months, I won the battle and I am left with one pimple on my left cheek. Both of my cheeks are now filled with acne scars. HUNDREDS OF EM’.

From my research, Vitamin C is the best for treating hyperpigmentation or acne scars/dark spots. It is available in the form of serum and tablets, so I go for both. At first I bought Hiruscar Post-Acne gel, I’m not sure if it works, the progress is slow so after 2 tube I stopped. Then I bought Hakubi White C Plus supplement. I think the best way to get rid of the acne scars is from inside out. There are many Vitamin C supplements out there but which one gives a rapid result (In a safe way)? I asked a pharmacist and she said yes you can consume any Vitamin C, but she suggest this Hakubi supplement as she gets good review from those who’ve tried it. (The pharmacist is not a promoter of any product btw.) I am also in no way of promoting anything, just take a look at my pictures below.

The first picture is on 9th December 2017 and the second is on 30th December 2017. Ok so less than a month??? You can see the difference on your own. I seriously didn’t notice this until I look at the before picture. I have been taking comparison photos ever since I got severe acne and put it all in an album titled Doxycycline Journey hahaha. I want to see progress.

So this is the product :

Bought it from Watsons for RM90 on promo but the original price is RM122. Yes I also know the name “White C Plus” sounds like I’m obsessed with getting a whiter skin but no guys, I just want to make my acne scars disappear. Also, I am used to drinking 3L of water everyday. Water is necessary for better results, and don’t just drink water because you want it to work, but make it as your routine, your savior, for your own health. I won’t be continuing using this product, don’t get me wrong, it really works, but I am going for a new supplement that is for both hair & skin. Saves money on my side hehe. The new supplement I got contains the same key ingredients as in Hakubi, so I am glad on that part, just that the amount is lesser. I will be reviewing the new local product in a month or two, to see if it works. Hopefully it does from all the great reviews I read!

Head on to my Instagram, @juliannaong to see what my favorite local brand lipstick and best drugstore foundation that I personally tried and love!

An honest review by me, not sponsored, and the results are displayed as evidence.

My fellow singletons

Here I am, after watching two Bridget Jones’s movie on TV today, and now continuing with the Bridget Jones’s Baby online while eating McDonalds. I have never relate so much with her, Bridget, knowing the fact that I’ll be playing All By Myself on New Year’s Eve. Oh stop it already. I am taking myself too serious and it gets boring. Gotta have some humour in life, like how Bridget does. How’s work? Well, work is fine. Work is work and I am catching up to the speed. But socially? I think I have poor social skills.

Weird. I am a spontaneous person, with extensive usage of profanity in daily conversation, but it all disappear once I’m in a new environment. Logically, my colleagues are all older than me, bunch of professionals, and the women are the normal Malays. Once again, I am not going to have new friends to hangout with. Certainly not them. This thought turned me into the most innocent person in front of them. I became so naïve that it annoys me now. I humbled myself while I was learning new things in the office up to a point I feel like I am fooling myself. So tomorrow’s a new day. Julianna will be brave, bold, and fun maybe?

Whatever it is, I am going to make work fun for me. I admit I envy a new colleague of mine a bit. She can mix in with the rest so effortlessly. I can actually, but since they are not really of my age nor are they really of my kind (clubbing, drinking, cursing) and the bad side of me can never be unleashed when I’m with them, so I held back. I act innocent and stupid so I can learn as much as I can about work. Fuck, why do I complain so much? Just only a few more months before it all ends. Working is a wake up call for me, that I have to be prepared with getting scolded for my mistakes, and facing two faced asshole colleagues that won’t admit their mistakes and then try to blame it on me, so I have to be alert with all of this. Enjoy work, but perform the best, be the best, so I can never get blamed for anything.

I also ate lots of protein for the last 2 weeks, and vegetables surprisingly, forcing the carrots and broccoli down my throat, trying not to vomit it all out back, but the effort all boils down to me eating shit on the weekend. I eat like a pig. A fucking pig. I might as well go eat with the pigs and they’d never notice that I’m human, just from the way I eat. Haha. Sometimes I pressure myself to lose weight, I keep on touching my tummy and see how big it is, feeling all sad seeing how fat I am. I do know that if I put more effort, and control myself, I could easily lose all this weight and look pretty. I am not even obese, just overweight, so its not that hard to lose weight compared to others who are obese but still manage to lose weight. I can’t process the thought of having to enjoy my favourite food as a cheat meal, once in a while, as a permanent lifestyle, just so I can lose weight and maintain it, while others can eat whatever shit they want, how much they want, and never put on a fucking kilo. That’s how unfair life is. Fuck my life. Here I am, complaining more than ever.

Let me sleep

A bolster between my legs, a bantal busuk hugged tightly, a blanket wrapping me up from chest to toe, my sniffing the scent of pillow is somewhat soothing, and the soft friction between my skin and the bed…

And then the alarm rings.

I purposely set the alarm earlier than the time I am supposed to wake up so that I can happily sleep back, even for a while. I have attachment issues with my bed. I hate waking up from my sleep. I grunt and get pissed when I know I have to wake up. Not a good way to start the day, hence I am never a morning person. I don’t find joy in waking up early in the morning. Even though I get enough sleep, I still want to sleep more. I also do not have a water heater, so knowing that I have to brave through the fucking cold water, and by cold I mean ice cold, makes me hate waking up even more. This is such a negative post hahaha.

wake up

 

I get up at 7:10 mins (extra 10 mins matter!!!) an hour earlier spent on makeup and blow drying my hair. EVERYDAY. Yes, how different could it be from the usual routine of going to school early in the morning right? I have no idea, I don’t hate early mornings much back in high school I guess, I hate it more now. This week has been weird for me. I get tired from work, already jumping in my bed as soon as I arrived home, and sleeping before 12 am, which is way to early to sleep. 1 am, 2 am, is fine back then. Now, now I am 20 and sleeping like there’s no tomorrow. I can no longer stay awake for The Good Wife marathon, as I snored after 2 CDs and closed my eyes while it played on the laptop, ensuring myself that I would wake up again to watch, well I did not.

I imagine work later on would be hard to balance with having a fun life. Socializing, clubbing and other activities seem impossible if I put sleep first. Having sex also might be delayed when I’m married cause I’d just be dead asleep!!! Haha, dramatic. I need to do something more than having a same routine of work-home-sleep-work every single day. It kills me. I wanted to read more, workout more, and just grow mentally, for myself, during this long break. Maybe I should try keeping my eyes open for 2 hours before deciding to sleep, and fill the time with one of the activity I plan on doing.

stay awake

 

Entering the corporate world

I landed with a job in a corporate company about a week after I finished my final exam. I have already been searching for a job through MauKerja website and occasional walk ins, which leads me to a few interviews. There are only 2 reasons I didn’t get or want the jobs I applied previously,

  1. The salary is too low
  2. I’m not the suitable candidate

I was greedy. Julianna is a greedy little bitch. I search high and low for a job that will give me sufficient experience and something new to learn, alongside providing a better salary than the jobs I worked before. There are EPF & SOCSO that will be futher deducted from my salary, I am not greedy to spend the money, but to only make sure that I still have a reasonable amount left when deducted for me to put aside as savings. But I am worried as well as I don’t have any experience doing office work, had I only worked in places like Watsons, tuition teacher, beauty promoter, and retail sales related jobs. Interviews for those job are informal. This time, I prepared my resume a month before my finals end, and I excitedly applied to the jobs on MauKerja website, going to interviews, to only stumble when the interviewer asked me, “So tell me a little bit about yourself.” My mind went blank for 15 seconds. I’m not sure what to say, should I repeat what I typed on my resume? But its all there, so what’s the point asking me again? I went on with introducing my name and talking about my personality and previous working experience. It was short. I think I am doomed.

I went home face-palming at myself, and clicked on Youtube, Google for ways to introduce myself properly. My point is, now that I have learned it the embarrassing way, just a reminder to you and myself in the future, to always do your research because when you think you know enough already, you don’t. A few days later, I received a call from an insurance company I applied through the MauKerja, and passed the phone interview. There’s a second interview afterwards at the office located at a high tower building in the centre of Klang. They told me the interview would take about 3 hours, so I thought wow, this is a very serious and formal company. Little did I know that they did not describe thoroughly what the job I am applying for on the website, as I walked in to being pitched through a presentation that took 2 hours, telling me about a 10 years plan of being their insurance company partner. You know how annoying and persuading insurance people are right? I hate being one that’s for sure. Surprisingly, I was being honest the entire time, telling them how I have zero knowledge about insurance, how I am not sure if I am covered by insurance, or how I never buy into what an insurance sales person sell, but I think they like my honesty. Well I am a terrible liar anyway, so I cannot lie about things I don’t know.

Ok long story short, one day, I plan to enter every office in the BBT North Tower and apply for a job. While I’m at the 3rd floor, this particular office had already called me for an interview right away. The next day, Julianna starts working! I am your receptionist cum admin clerk. I have never did any office work before, so trust me when I say I am blur as fuck and just keep on trying to absorb everything as fast as I can. I wrote notes on Post-It and sticked it on the inside of my counter table until there’s no space left. I refer to my supervisor about anything I don’t understand, including how to transfer a phone call from a person to the other. That’s how stupid I am. It will annoy them I know, but to avoid mistakes I must do so. And I really enjoy learning from her, she trained me well with patience, and never once did she judged me for my dressing, or how I mistakenly called an older staff by her name, (Malays use Kak-female/Abang-male as a sign of respect to anyone older) (watched too much of The Good Wife).

I drink 2L of water everyday in the office, and another 1L at home. I pee for every 500mL I drank. And I have to inform my senior staff everytime I have to go to the toilet, how embarrassing, so she can replace me if anything. A simple job, one of the lower rank jobs compared to others in the office, but a big challenge for me, with many small details to remember, such as asking a Dato’ every morning when he enters if he wants a newspaper, or preparing drinks for when the partners of the company comes from overseas, those details. Communicating has been easy for me, but I still have a nerve wrack for every first time.

Do you all remember your first time working? How was it?

Counting days till 2018

img_0712img_0746.jpg2017-11-29 18:16:23.7042017-11-30 15:43:37.236

I have been craving for the Terengganu keropok lekor for weeks but I settled for the usual keropok lekor sold at pasar malam. One day I bought a burger at the Ramly Mart, they sell both frozen products and have their own food kiosk, so I tried their keropok lekor. You know how Terengganu one is different from the usual right? It has more fish and tastes sooooo much better. Guess what! Ramly sells their own Terengganu keropok lekor for only RM6.80 a packet! Its hard for me not having a direct supply of keropok lekor from Terengganu so I’ll accept this haha.

It has been almost 4 months of me taking Doxycycline for my severe acne and I can say I am satisfied with it. There’s only 3-4 acne left on my cheeks, and the rest are acne scars. WHICH FRUSTRATES ME THE MOST. Scars take forever to completely disappear. I am now using Hiruscar Post Acne Gel and Hakubi White C plus (vitamin C supplement) to treat the scars. From my research, vitamin C is the best source to treat scars. There’s plenty of it in the form of serum and supplements, so choose which suits you best. I am happier now that when I put on makeup, the acne bumps are no longer there. I do struggle with dry skin and yes the scars of course. I don’t have the skills to cover em up with makeup yet 😂

And exams over! Phewww. 9 months long break before degree so I plan to work, lose weight, read more, and focus on building myself mentally also physically. We have a month left before 2018 begins, so let’s finish 2017 strong. I aim to workout intensely and do a strict diet, because I want to end 2017 feeling proud of myself. For now I am alternating between working out and eating afterwards so…..bitch when will you stop eating?!

What’s your plan?

Just breathe

Sometimes I question myself, “Why do I stay in my room so much when I can go out and witness a view like this?”

Hospital Tengku Ampuan Rahimah, Klang

Since my paper starts at 11am today, I went to pick up my acne medicine at the GH pharmacy first thing in the morning. Arrive early, empty parking lot. I did this before when I attended my Psych appointments. Just walk around or sit and look at the view from this 3-storey parking lot. Very peaceful. Today, as I listened to Breathe (2AM) by Anna Nalick, one of the songs I used to listen back in the depressed days, this song has different meaning to me now. To just breathe, calm down, and think of nothing else, is such a privilege and a blessing. Nothing made me feel happy at the moment. In fact I am having tons of life problems. But looking up at the sky, as the sunrise, is what made me smile.

When I was in high school, my view from the class was the GH. I can see it clearly from afar, in the shape of Titanic funnily. It is the same feeling as I’m having now, a peaceful view, reminding me how little my problems are, and how life is so much more than worrying or caring what other people say of you.

🎶 Try listening to Japanese Denim by Daniel Caesar